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Watch your pronouns, Mr. Edwards

In the English language we have what are commonly called personal pronouns (he/she/him/her).  As seen on MSNBC this morning, John Edwards seems to have forgotten that these pronouns can hold FAR more power than they are worth. 

John, you did a wonderful job holding your own throughout the interview but you did say you voted for “him.”  And there is absolutely nothing wrong with that.


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27 Dresses out on DVD (or video as we used to say…)

After a week of depressing April weather with not a glimpse of summer in sight, I decided to rent 27 Dresses on Friday night–just out on DVD.  And, of course, I LOVED IT.  Any movie that capitalizes on an Elton John song for its biggest and best scene is a cinematic masterpiece (see Almost Famous et al).

For those of you who don’t obsess over the wedding announcements in the New York Times or myriad other local papers, you probably won’t like the movie.  But then again you might because Katherine Heigel is pretty good looking and you’re probably male.

In any event, I would like to point out that this past Sunday’s “Vows” section in the famed “Weddings and Celebrations” portion of the Times is particularly wonderful.  It includes the wedding of Lisa Stenson and Antonio Desamours and phrases like, “she is the black Jacqueline Kennedy,” and “assuming the elegance of a seasoned ballroom dancer…” as well as a reference to a token trip to the Hamptons. 

For all the brides out there, white or black or brown, all you need to do is hit on these three things and your wedding will be covered in the Times.  It also helps if you or your finance is from Connecticut.  It sounds better than Jersey…

See also Gawker:  Altarcations. They talk about the wedding announcements every week but are funnier than me.

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The Secret? Not so much

Rhonda Byrne, project creator and “master mind” (please note sarcasm here) behind The Secret empire apparently reneged on profit sharing promises she made to those who worked with her.  My question here is did she see this coming? 

And what is the secret in hording your earnings from fellow directors and producers?  Hasn’t Hollywood been doing this for years?

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So last night I was walking to the PATH station after work (aka Port Authority Trans Hudson or Pleasant As Train Hell) and I saw a man smoking a pipe.  Please bear in mind that this was the west village and not 18th century London.

This got me thinking that if you are going to smoke you might as well get throat, mouth, lip AND lung cancer.  Why just stop at one?

If I smoked cigarettes I would definitely roll my own.  And note to all the fellows out there–this is THE hottest thing you can do other than look like Brad, Matthew or George.  However, I prefer my cancer in the forms of UV rays, aspertame, and burnt toast.

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I am SO glad you play football too

In yesterday’s NYT we had an interesting piece on author and n+1 editor, Keith Gessen.  Though the posed photos on the left hand side of the screen leave something to be desired, I thoroughly enjoyed the fact that this well-known hipster and young member of the literati was interviewed while playing a game of football with the dudes.  We are to assume this is a regularly scheduled game and not a mere case of “pick-up football” in Prospect park due to the fact that Mr. Gessen’s teammates are bummed out that he will be leaving on book tour and no longer able to play with them.  

I recently read All the Sad Young Literary Men and I am SO relieved to know that this guy plays football you have no idea.  I mean there really are a dwindling supply of single, straight, alpah male-esque sort of artsy men available.  And since his book seems, I hate to say it, extremely autobiographical, knowing that the “Keith character” gets down and dirty with said, “literary agents, bloggers, and bond traders” proves his masculinity and makes him somewhat more enchanting to me.

If you want to read Mr. Gessen’s novel I suggest skipping to the chapter entitled, Google.  It is by FAR the wittiest and most self-depracating you will find.

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