1)  If something is a “trend” in the Hamptons it most likely is seen as completely bizarre to the rest of the country

2)  Why do the McCain and Obama cups say just that but the Hillary ones say “Hillary”?  HMMM

http://www.nytimes.com/2008/05/11/fashion/11mono.html?ref=style

In the English language we have what are commonly called personal pronouns (he/she/him/her).  As seen on MSNBC this morning, John Edwards seems to have forgotten that these pronouns can hold FAR more power than they are worth. 

John, you did a wonderful job holding your own throughout the interview but you did say you voted for “him.”  And there is absolutely nothing wrong with that.

http://thecaucus.blogs.nytimes.com/2008/05/09/rewinding-on-edwards-did-he-vote-for-him/

This morning on the aforementioned PATH train (Pretty Awful Train Hell or any derivation thereof) I saw the most horrendous thing that deserves the biggest time out EVER…

I was seated next to another young woman with a broken toe (she had on a walking cast) and next to her were two able bodied middle aged men.  On the other side of me were more ABLE BODIED MEN.  Enter an extremeley pregnant woman.  NOTE to all men:  you can tell a woman is pregnant when she has thin arms and a gianormous belly.  Did one of them stand up to give her their seat? NOPE.

And not to toot my own horn here (well, ok, maybe to toot just a little) I stood up, pointy toed heels and all and gave her my GD seat. 

Being born with male genitals means you will never have to endure pregnancy and that you will have to give up your seat on the PATH train and be the last on the life raft when your ship is sinking.  Time out to those suits who think they are too good for this.  PS your wives probably hate you too.

After a week of depressing April weather with not a glimpse of summer in sight, I decided to rent 27 Dresses on Friday night–just out on DVD.  And, of course, I LOVED IT.  Any movie that capitalizes on an Elton John song for its biggest and best scene is a cinematic masterpiece (see Almost Famous et al).

For those of you who don’t obsess over the wedding announcements in the New York Times or myriad other local papers, you probably won’t like the movie.  But then again you might because Katherine Heigel is pretty good looking and you’re probably male.

In any event, I would like to point out that this past Sunday’s “Vows” section in the famed “Weddings and Celebrations” portion of the Times is particularly wonderful.  It includes the wedding of Lisa Stenson and Antonio Desamours and phrases like, “she is the black Jacqueline Kennedy,” and “assuming the elegance of a seasoned ballroom dancer…” as well as a reference to a token trip to the Hamptons. 

For all the brides out there, white or black or brown, all you need to do is hit on these three things and your wedding will be covered in the Times.  It also helps if you or your finance is from Connecticut.  It sounds better than Jersey…

http://www.nytimes.com/2008/05/04/fashion/weddings/04vows.html?ref=style

See also Gawker:  Altarcations. They talk about the wedding announcements every week but are funnier than me.

Rhonda Byrne, project creator and “master mind” (please note sarcasm here) behind The Secret empire apparently reneged on profit sharing promises she made to those who worked with her.  My question here is did she see this coming? 

And what is the secret in hording your earnings from fellow directors and producers?  Hasn’t Hollywood been doing this for years?

The word is OUT… Ms Walters had an affair with a senator.  A million years ago. 

Promoting her recent book, Audition, Ms Walter’s tells Opes that she had an affair with the first African American to be elected to the Senate.  Is that what you have to do this days to sell a memoir?  Time out, Babs, why would you decide all of a sudden to let the world in on your little secret.  Are you THAT sick and tired of the lesbian rumors?  Because guess what…they are still going to exist.

The real news here is not that she had an affair with a married black man.  It’s that he was a Republican too.  Now, WHAT WAS SHE THINKING?

http://ap.google.com/article/ALeqM5hD3wc2Wz4t3sdmX5Nr7_UI-6iw1QD90D1H081

Time out goes to Jonny for calling Michiko Kakutani the ’stupidest person in New York City’ during a panel at Harhvardh the other day.  Let’s take a look at their bios pulled from Wikipedia and see who is stupider…shall we?

Franzen was born in Chicago, Illinois, raised in Webster Groves, a suburb of St. Louis, Missouri, and educated at Swarthmore College. He also studied on a Fulbright Scholarship in Germany.

The only child of noted Yale mathematician Shizuo Kakutani, Michiko Kakutani was born in New Haven, Connecticut. She received her B.A. in English literature from Yale University in 1976.^[1] After graduation she initially worked as a reporter for The Washington Post, and then for TIME magazine from 1977-1979. In 1979, she joined The New York Times as a reporter.  She is a Pulitzer Prize winning critic for the New York Times.

Sorry Jon.  The mere fact that Michiko learned to spell her name properly as a young child points to the fact that she is no idiot.

Maybe next time you can write a book people actually want to read (preferably not about yourself–hmm?) and she’ll give you a good review.

But probably not.

VS

Apparently some genius put their dope down and decided to write a biography about Joni Mitchell, Carly Simon, and Carole King.  Do I consider this literature?  NO.  Do I consider this an advancement of society and culture?  Absolutely. 

I mean all I know of poor Joni’s existence now is from that ridiculous article the Times did a year or so ago about how she is currently choreographing ballets or something equally as absurd.

I believe the book title and jacket say it all—GIRLS LIKE US.  Yes, just like Senator Obama these ladies have had trouble relatin’ to the common folk.  Maybe they should try eating waffles at a greasy diner…

I have included the Amazon link for all you instant gratificationers. 

http://www.amazon.com/dp/0743491475/?tag=googhydr-20&hvadid=1703620841&ref=pd_sl_6pkn2p33zu_e